The only authentic pet psychic on the planet!

Do you long for authenticity in your relationships? Do you trust your cat more than most people you know? Do you believe everything that your mother tells you? Do you live in California? Do you have a twisted sense of humor? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to consult with the only real pet psychic on the planet. He can tell you where you are going and what to do about it.

Cato is now accepting a limited number of private clients. If you have questions about your love life, your health or your future job prospects, don't hesitate to email him for an appointment.

Contact Cato petpsychic[at]mindspring[dot]com for a reading.

What his customers say:

"He is not a god-fearing cat, but still, he is highly accurate and told me that I was going down the road to hell with Al Gonzales."

---George Bush, President of the United States

"He has a creepy voice and an unusual sense of humor. He predicted that I would win the Nobel Peace prize in January of 2007. I didn't believe him!"

-- Al Gore, Vice President of the United States

"I'd roll in catnip with him anytime he asks. Were his predictions accurate? Ask my mother that one, buddy."

--LiLo

Read more about Cato's clients in Diary of a Pet Psychic.

Comments

[Liquidiamonds]

Bruno, the Voiceless Wonder, lives with me & my boyfriend. He is an opportunist who vacillates between living me and loving my boyfriend. How can I tell if his intentions with me are pure, or if he's just sucking up for treats?

[Cato]

Liquidiamonds, in reality Bruno is a hardened feline criminal. While you are wondering if he loves you, he has tapped into your bank account and drained it to finance his own army to take over the federal government. The coup de etat will take place on Dec. 7. Bruno will personally pull the trigger on George and Bush who will be dining together on Kobe beef. He will also slaughter the Supreme Court for their actions during the 2000 election. I predict that he will appear on Oprah in January and explain to the American people what his intentions are. His intentions? An unlimited supply of treats 24/7. By this time next year, he will have pulled us out of Iraq and Afghanistan. Our economy will be booming and we will have invaded Mexico and declared it the 51st state. Unfortunately, three years from now he will die from obesity, having plumped up to 350 pounds with the unlimited treats he has consumed. He will literally explode on the floor of the oval office. For more information about the future of your relationship with your boyfriend, please email me for my rates. Sincerely, Cato